The Gray Hair Wins

Sometimes people with a little gray in their hair get nervous about the whole Social Media thing. They tell me that the younger generations are more suited to Social Media and feel that it’s a younger person’s game.

Actually, a younger person may be technologically ahead of their older counterparts, but the older person is in a better position than the young punk.

The younger person may know which buttons to push, which apps to load and so on, but they don’t have the life experience, business acumen or battle scars of the older person. They haven’t had the successes or been kicked in the teeth by life and business, haven’t seen markets rise and fall and have a limited view of the world and business for the simple reason that they just haven’t been around as long.

Folks with some years on them know that long-term business and life success is based on relationships. Learning how to use Social Media most effectively isn’t about being a computer, iPad, iPhone, Blackberry, or gizmo-of-the-month ninja. It’s about gaining a simple working knowledge of how to use modern communication channels to build and enhance mutually beneficial, win-win relationships.

I’ll take folks with a little gray in their hair who are teachable over younger people with electronic addictions any day.

2

Get Real

People often ask me, “Kev, how should I be on Social Media?” I get a kick out of that question, because it’s similar to asking me, “Kev, how should I be on the telephone?”

Let’s change the word “on” to “through.” You’re not “on” the telephone anymore than you’re “on” Social Media. You communicating through the telephone and through Social Media.

So my answer to their question is usually, “Be however you would be face to face.” You should be yourself because everyone else is already taken.

The words “authentic” and “transparent” have almost become clichés, but they make sense. People are going to figure out who you are anyway, so you may as well be authentic and transparent.

But even those words are a little too “marketing speak” for me. I like a simpler word. Like “real”.

Be real. Because people will figure out whether you’re real or not very quickly. And don’t worry so much about “getting” real.

Just be real. Really.

1

Netiquette Is Online Etiquette

Whether online or offline, manners make a difference.  I like to call internet etiquette, “netiquette”.

A habit I learned a long time ago that has served me very well through the years is starting phone conversations with, “Hi John, it’s Kev. Do you have a quick minute or is this a bad time?”

There are very few people who start conversations like this. It’s a huge show of respect to the person whom you’re calling.

Make sure you’re doing the same thing online. Because I often have Facebook running in the background on my computer, people pop up in the chat box all the time and often just launch into conversations.

And sometimes they’re people I don’t know well at all that start conversations with sales pitches. Yikes.

Remember that most people are quite busy. Approach them politely and be respectful of their time. I guarantee you the outcome of your conversation will turn out better when you do.

You Only Have One Chance To Make A Good First Impression

I’m catching up on some work in a coffee shop between meetings. And a stranger just walked up to me and said, “You look older in person than you do on Facebook and the internet.”

How’s that for an icebreaker? You think I’m gonna forget her? I doubt it.

I smiled and replied, “Thanks. I cram a lot of living into every day.”

Things that our parents and grandparents used to tell us when we were kids are still true. Things like, “You only have one chance to make a first impression.” And, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Whether online or offline, people are people. Remember the things our elders taught us. They make sense.

It’s very hard to go back and make a good first impression. All things being equal, people do business with and refer business to people they know, like, and trust. Don’t make it harder for people to know, like, and trust you by not making a good first impression. Either online or offline. Or both.

5

You Don’t Need SMS (Social Media Stress)

If  you think that you have to stay up on every new bell and whistle on every Social Media site, you’re asking for a headache. And lack of sleep. And frustration. And stress.

Most people have enough stress in their lives. They don’t need SMS (Social Media Stress).

It’s the nature of technology to change quickly and without notice.

I tell my audiences that when I get in the morning, one of the first questions I ask is, “What did they change on Facebook while I was sleeping?” And the audience laughs and when they stop laughing I tell them that I was serious.

So relax. This technology stuff is only going to accelerate. Get used to it. Kind of like the way you get used to weather. You observe it, maybe predict it a little, but basically realize there’s not a lot you can do about it, except to buy an umbrella or winter coat.

Realize that Social Media isn’t about technology, it’s about people. Just because you can drive a car doesn’t mean you should be able to fix a transmission. Just because there are a million nuances, functionalities, shiny bells and whistles on every Social Media site doesn’t mean you have to be the master of them all.

Focus on the functions that build and enhance communication and relationships. That’s where you want to live.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Repeat.

2

You Just Popped In My Head So I Thought I’d Call

We all have times during the day when someone pops in our mind. These are great opportunities to build and strengthen relationships.

Just for fun, the next time someone pops in your mind, pick up the phone and call them. You’re probably busy and don’t have much time, so start the conversation like this, “Hi Joan, this is Kevin. I only have a quick minute, but you just popped in my mind and I’ve learned that when someone pops in my mind, I should call and at least say hi. HI! Again, I only have a real quick minute, so maybe we can talk longer another time. Anything I can help you with real quick before I have to run?”

People will be amazed that you took the quick minute or two to call them and they’ll be glad you did. With all the high-tech, many people are forgetting the high touch. Never pass up a chance to make a personal connection. Huge doors of opportunity swing on little tiny hinges. And those hinges are called relationships.

NATO Chiefs Use Facebook To Announce News To World

Just in case there’s still anyone out there who thinks that Social Media is a pet rock, mood ring, or hula hoop, we now have NATO Chiefs announcing the end of armed conflicts on Facebook.

Reread that. On Facebook.

But this really shouldn’t be so surprising. Social Media has always been a communication channel. And if you’re gonna go fishing, go where the fish are.

With over 800,000,000 people on Facebook, announcing the end of armed conflict in Libya on Facebook just makes sense.

And once you process that, wrap your head around this one: 75% of the world’s population has never even been online. Yup.

There’s a wave coming like we can’t even imagine. Exciting time to be alive.

 

What Happens In Vegas, Doesn’t Stay In Vegas

I’m staying and speaking at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas for a few days this week. I love Vegas and think everyone should get a dose of alternate reality from time to time.

The saying “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas”, may have worked 20 years ago, but it doesn’t hold water now.

The world is getting smaller and what goes around, comes around. Social Media is creating a more transparent world. This isn’t a bad thing.

So do good things. Add massive value at every opportunity. Pay it forward. Because information travels literally at the speed of light.

By seeking to serve, you create more opportunities to serve. And that’s true regardless of whether you’re in Topeka or Las Vegas.

Sooner or later we reap what we sow. So sow good. We can’t outrun our character, and what happens in Vegas, doesn’t stay in Vegas.

2

Organic Growth Is Natural In Social Media

We can learn a lot from nature. In nature, few things grow extremely quickly. Things have their own pace and rarely spike in terms of growth rate.

As you are growing your LinkedIn Connections, Facebook Friends and Twitter Followers, remember nature. Remember that slow and steady wins the race. And then remember that Social Media isn’t a race.

Be leery of the folks who tout offers to “Grow your followers by 50 bajillion in 5 minutes” and crap like that. Be very leery. How unnatural.

Yes, Social Media enables us to communicate with more people and much more quickly. But remember that relationships aren’t rushed. And effective Social Media is all about relationships.

I don’t know exactly what ‘organic’ means, although I heard the word used a lot in business over the last few years. It’s one of those buzz-words that’s in style right now.

I’ll use the word ‘organic’ to mean ‘nature-like’ or ‘natural’. In my simple thinking, this makes sense and as in most things we should follow nature’s example. Don’t rush the harvest.

Grow your connections, friends and followers naturally. Connect with people, offer value and be friendly. Don’t make it more complicated than that. All things being equal, people do business with and refer business to people they know, like and trust.

Yes, your networks can grow to some staggering numbers, but the most effective people realize that it’s grown one by one. Which is very natural.

People Are People Wherever You Go

I travel a lot. I get to see some amazing places and visit some incredible locations. I get to eat in fine restaurants and also at McDonald’s. I stay in five-star resorts and in fleabag motels. I experience a lot of contrast on a daily basis.

And no matter where I go, there’s always one thing that’s consistent. People are people wherever you go. Regardless of whether they’re wearing a Rolex or a Timex, whether they’re picking me up at the airport in a Mercedes S500, or a rusted out Yugo, whether they’ve got a bunch of letters after their name or they can barely write, people are the same wherever you go.

We all want to be appreciated, have fun, be loved and feel safe. We want to be happy. We want to make a difference. We want to have an impact.

Remember this as you’re spending time on your Social Media platforms. It’s not about technology, it’s about people. Always has been, always will be.

Take the extra minute to let people know that you’re thinking of them and that they matter to you. Never pass up an opportunity to make something personal. The personal touch is everything.

The world is getting smaller and folks are figuring out that we’re far more alike than different in so many ways. This is a good thing.

So travel, have fun, take pictures, collect experiences, and make sure that you remember that regardless of how sophisticated technology gets, people are people wherever you go.

Change is Inevitable, Growth is Optional

The only constant is change. What a cliché. And it’s a cliché, because it’s true.

The last few years for most people have been a time of definite change. Some for the better, some for the worse.

If you watch television news or read the newspaper, you’d come to the conclusion that we’re all going to hell in a hand basket, the country is collapsing and that the end of the world is near.

Don’t forget that the news media gets paid to distribute negative news. Literally. And in-between the dire predictions you can watch ads for depression medication.

Successful people know that success is a decision. And it starts with a decision to focus on the positive.

Focusing on the positive, doesn’t mean denying that we’re in tough times or that if we just think about positive things they’ll somehow show up in our lives.

It means realizing that times are tough, but instead of focusing on problems, we choose to focus on solutions.

And the key word is “choose.” Change is going to happen. The question then is, what kind of change are you going to choose?

I suggest one choice is to add massive value to people. In ways that maybe you’ve never thought of before.

Here’s an exercise: in the morning as you’re having that first cup of coffee, think for five minutes about how you can add more value to your co-workers, your clients, prospects, referral partners and everyone who you come in contact with that day.

You don’t need to think outside the box, because the only box that exists is the one you create in your mind. Realize that there is no box to think outside of. It’s wide open, baby.

Change is inevitable, growth is optional. Choose growth; both personal and professional.

History is full of examples of companies that started in extremely tough times. And history is also full of examples of people who redirected their lives while everyone else was complaining about their circumstances. Choose growth.

Speaking of growth, I have been blessed to experience tremendous growth in my business this year. I now have a Business Manager and you will be seeing some changes in my newsletter, the services and products that I will be offering.

One of the immediate changes I am making is how I deliver my newsletter. The change train is here and if you’d like to hop on it with me  please sign up now so you can automatically be added to my new system.  I suggest you do it NOW while it’s still fresh in your mind. You do know that “Do It Now” people get things done, right?

https://kevinknebl.com/newsletter

Please add your comment below.  I’d love to hear from you on this topic. Here’s looking to our growing together!

1

Be An Example

The best way to teach is by example. This applies to everything including Social Media.

People tend to become like the people they associate with and that explains why so many people are negative. But you don’t have to be.

Just as in real life, when you’re a downer, people don’t want to hang out with you. The same applies to LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, etc.

Post positive, uplifting things. This doesn’t mean that you’re some Pollyanna who denies that there’s a lot of crap out there. It means that you choose what to focus on.

Be an example of someone who understands that people have enough crap in their lives and you’re not here to add to it.

Be a ray of sunshine in people’s day. Regardless of the business you’re in.

Because whatever business it appears that you’re in, we’re really all in the same business. The people business. Except only a small number of people know this. Be one of them.

1

Repeat After Me…..

Earl Nightingale said, “We become what we think about all day long, whether we want to or not.” This is as true as gravity.

When I got into sales back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, I learned early that sales is about relationships and not closing lines. I picked up Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People” and devoured it.

I didn’t read it, I studied it. Read street signs. Read menus. Study books.

And like most people, I often told myself that I had a bad memory. And lo and behold, I did. Reread that Nightingale quote above.

So every morning when I got in the shower, I took one of Carnegie’s simple, one-sentence principles and repeated it out loud over and over until I got out of the shower. And then I repeated it while I shaved. And then I repeated it in my car on my way to my sales calls.

Over time, I memorized them. And then the results of believing them showed up in my life in terms of improved relationships and business and sales success.

Here’s the kicker…..you’re repeating something whether you realize it or not. Choose wisely.

Want More Energy?

Energy is a valuable commodity. Personal energy is even more valuable.

Dale Carnegie taught, “Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.” Criticizing, condemning, and complaining deplete your energy. Your personal energy is too valuable to squander.

Giving sincere appreciation and expressing gratitude produce energy. And in an amazing bit of universal karma, they also produce energy in the people you appreciate and express gratitude to.

This is not rocket science. Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.

In your business and personal life, give as much appreciation as you can and express your gratitude at every opportunity. And there’s no lack of opportunities.

 

Remember the Phone?

As you’re connecting with everyone on Social Media platforms, don’t forget that people are more than their static profile pictures and postings. Part of adding value to people is getting to know them better.

As busy as we all are, we choose how to spend our time. Some folks choose to invest their time instead of spending it.

We all spend time in our cars. Invest a little bit of time every day calling your Social Media-mates on the phone while you’re cruising down the road. Holy crap – did I say call them on the phone?! Yup, I did.

Start the conversation with, “Hi Mary! I only have a quick minute, but I was thinking of you and wanted to call and say hi.” By starting with letting them know that you only have a tiny bit of time, they’ll know that this isn’t going to be a “War and Peace” conversation. If you have a difficult time getting off the phone, politely interrupt them by reminding them that you only have a minute and that you have to go.

You’re not doing this to be strategic, manipulative or any of that stuff, you’re doing it because you want to take a sincere interest in them. That’s what relationships are about, isn’t it?

I’m betting that if you give people a quick buzz, they won’t forget it. They don’t forget it when I call them. People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. Care.

No “yes.” Either “HELL YEAH!” or “no.”

Derek Sivers has written a short masterpiece in his book, “Anything You Want.” He unintentionally started a business and ended up becoming a multi-millionaire by serving people. That’s what successful business do, don’t they? Serving people, that is.

One of the things he talks about is the concept of ‘No “yes.” Either “HELL YEAH!” or “no.” This is a great thing to learn especially if you’re over-committed or too scattered.

If you’re deciding whether to do something, if you feel anything other than psyched, jazzed and fired up about doing it, don’t. By saying “no” to many things it opens up space for you to pursue the things you love.

This may sound over-simplistic. It’s not. The book will take you less than an hour to read. If you’re a small business owner or thinking of starting your own business, or pursuing a passion, this is required reading.

There will be a quiz. It’s called your happiness.

You’re Farther Along Than You Think You Are

A client of mine in Canada recently sent me a news article on the London rioters using Social Media as a way to organize. Most folks have figured out that SM sites enable people to organize. Mubarak knows this. Gaddafi knows this. Charlie Sheen knows this.

The interesting thing to me is that police departments and governments are just starting to know this. How long did it take before police departments started using the telephone after it was invented?

The fact that you’re reading this post means that you’re probably farther along in terms of communication than many age-old entities such as the Post Office, local police departments, and many other institutions that have been around forever.

I bring this up because I meet a lot of people who tell me that they feel like they’re being left behind with all these advances like Social Media, etc. Don’t sweat it. Don’t think you have to become a technology geek with tape on your glasses.

Just communicate with people and understand that communication tools are changing all the time. Yes, put a little effort into staying up on what’s changing, but focus on the conversations. That’s where the gold is. You’re farther along than you think you are.

 

You Are A Creator

All kids love to make things. And very quickly we tend to start comparing what we’ve made to what other people have made and most folks determine that they’re not creative and that creativity is some magical ability that only special people are born with. What a crock.

You are creating every day whether you realize it or not. If you’re not creating something physically, you’re creating experiences. Don’t poo-poo this. People who create experiences tend to do far better than people who create tangible items.

When you get up in the morning, ask yourself, “Self….what shall I create today?” And then seek to make every human interaction with you magical. Pay it forward. Go out of your way to make people feel better about themselves. Under-promise and over-deliver. Show up early and stay late.

Here’s the secret that few know: creativity is magical and only for special people. And everyone is special. But 99% of humanity have forgotten this. Don’t forget. And leave a beautiful path of creativity behind you every day by creating wonderful experiences for yourself and others.

Think Win-Win

Success is based on relationships. People who are truly succeeding know this intuitively. Nothing and no one operates in a vacuum. As you build your life, business, etc, focus on only participating in, building, and enhancing mutually beneficial, win-win relationships.

The days of being a Rambo and leaving a bunch of bad relationships in your wake as you strive to “get ahead” are over. What goes around comes around and nowadays it comes around at the speed of light. Literally. If it’s not going to be a win-win situation, walk away.

Run to win-win relationships and life is an exciting and profitable adventure.

 

2

Travel Light

Baggage is heavy. Physical baggage and mental baggage. Most of us have things in the back of our minds that are nagging and eating at us. Let it go.

That may sound overly simplistic. It doesn’t have to be difficult. One saying that has helped me a lot over the years is, “Don’t believe everything you think.” This is radical and heresy to some people, but if you observe your mind the way you observe a cat playing with a ball of yarn, over time you come to the conclusion that you shouldn’t believe everything you think.

Just as in traveling, the less you carry, the easier and quicker it is to pick up and go. Keep that thought in mind as it relates to dealing with people. When you meet people, even though you may size them up intentionally or unintentionally, observe your mind checking out how they look, what they’re wearing, what they sound like and all the other evaluations that your mind is making. And then remember that these are judgements. Just observe these judgements and let them go.

People get on well with people who appreciate them and don’t judge them. The Buddha said, “Comparison is the beginning of all pain.” Well, maybe he didn’t exactly say it like that, but that’s what I got. Travel light. Reduce your load. See people like a child sees people. Choose to think the best of everyone until you’re proven wrong instead of thinking the worst of everyone and just waiting to have your suspicions confirmed. Travel light. You’ll cover a lot more ground and enjoy life so much more.