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I’m All About Paying It Forward And I’d Love You To Ask Me To Prove It

As our parents and grandparents told us, we only have one chance to make a good first impression. Make smart use of first impressions.

When someone sends you an email, calls you, leaves you a voice mail message, pings you on Social Media, etc. think about how you typically first respond to that person.

What if one of the first sentences out of your mouth or in your email or Facebook reply was “I’m all about paying it forward and I’d love you to ask me to prove it.”

I’m suggesting that this one simple act and then backing it up with action will transform your business and personal life.

It has mine.

1

Top Of Mind Awareness Is Easy

I meet so many business people who say they want to stay top of mind with their prospects, clients, customers and referral partners. Some of these folks fall for the offers of “We can get you 50 bajillion Twitter followers in an hour” and so on. That’s sad. How naive.

There’s a very easy way to stay top of mind. The problem is that anything easy to do is also easy not to do. How’s that NordicTrack clothes hanger in the corner working out?

The Golden Rule is the answer. You know, that “Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you” thing. If you’d like for people to say thanks when you do something for them, get in the habit of saying thanks. A lot.

If you’d like for people to refer you business, start referring business. If you’d like for people to be a little nicer, be the example. And so on. And on. And on.

The Golden Rule is called golden because it’s the most important rule. But here’s a little known secret. Shhh….don’t let this one out of the bag. Ready? Another reason why it’s called the Golden Rule is because if you develop the habit of applying it all day, every day, you’ll get rich. In every area of your life.

Give People The Benefit Of The Doubt

When people do something bone-headed, and we all do bone-headed things, it’s better to think the best of the person versus immediately coming down on them like a ton of bricks.

Take the extra few seconds or minutes to reach out to them and politely discuss the situation. More than likely they didn’t realize they were doing something to bother you.

It’s better to think the best of people and not become jaded. This takes practice.

Now, if they’re repeatedly doing things which lead you to believe that you’re dealing with a walking brain donor….

Use Social Media To Help People

This past Summer it was heartwarming to see the flood of support and encouragement that came from all over the USA and around the globe during the Waldo Canyon Fire which destroyed over 350 homes here in Colorado Springs.

During the last few days it has been amazing to see the devastation which Hurricane Sandy brought to the NorthEast and the MidWest. And it’s even greater to see the outpouring of support that’s being directed to the folks affected by this monster storm.

Thank God for Social Media. We can pay it forward, help people, spread the love and add massive value to people in ways we couldn’t have dreamed of ten or twenty years ago.

How are you using your Social Media channels to help people? It’s as close as your fingertips.

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Give Away More

While I was in Seattle this past weekend, I had dinner with my good friends and fellow International Speakers and Authors, Patrick Snow and Mark Matteson. The conversation was fantastic and it went into the night.

One of the things Mark said has been bouncing around in my head the last few days. He said that he’s learning to “Give away more.” Mark, Patrick and I have always been generous with the time, materials and consulting that we give away vs. what we get paid for by our clients and Mark challenged Patrick and I to raise the bar. I’m up for the challenge.

How do you give away value? I’m not proposing that you start giving away all your secret sauce that you earn money for. But what can you do on a daily and weekly basis to give more away because you’re a generous person? Yes, it will come back to you in many ways. But that’s not why I’m suggesting you give it away. Do it because you have a generous nature and consider what comes back, shaken down and pressed together as gravy. As the Red Hot Chili Peppers sang, “Give it away, give it away, give it away….”

You’re As Entitled As You Choose To Be

This is not a political post, so don’t go reading something into it, and please don’t put words in my mouth, it’s unsanitary. I hear people using the word “entitlement” a lot. I’m all for entitlement.

We are each blessed with unique abilities and skills. Yet few people take the time to identify them and leverage them to their fullest. Regardless of your age, investing the time to figure out what are your greatest strengths, is one of the wisest things you’ll ever do.

And then, you’re entitled to build on those strengths more and more. You are entitled to figure out how to use those gifts to deliver the most value to the world. You will be sought out for your uniqueness and well rewarded for it.

You are entitled to succeed to whatever level you choose. You are entitled to become the best version of yourself that you can be. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. You were given your gifts to encourage you to claim your entitlement. Go get it.

To Engage People On Social Media Ask More Questions

Online or offline, people are the same. Human nature doesn’t change.

Many people and organizations are trying to gain traction in Social Media and they’re missing the boat. They often think that if they talk more, they’ll get people’s attention. This is a rookie mistake.

It’s like dating. If you just talk about yourself all the time, the other person will smile politely while looking for an exit.

Think of the word “engaging.” As in “to engage.” We engage when we come up for air and let the other person talk.

Develop the habit of asking better questions. Don’t do like new salespeople do with the whole say it and spray it mentality.

Be more engaging. Ask more questions. And then sincerely listen.

Manners Never Go Out Of Style

We’re all very busy running hard. Since it’s so easy to take things out of context online without the facial expressions, tone, and all the other body language signals we normally see offline, it serves us well to err on the side of politeness.

I’ve written about this before, but it bears repeating. Say please and thank you when you’re online. If you haven’t spoken to someone in a long time, or perhaps ever, how hard is it to start a message with “Hi, long time no talk….” or “I know you’re busy so I’ll be brief….” or how about just a “Hello….”?

At the risk of sounding overly sensitive, when someone starts asking you questions or tries to get your attention without even a polite hello, don’t they realize that they’re starting the communication completely on the wrong foot? I guess not, because so many folks have no netiquette (internet etiquette).

It has never been easier for you to differentiate yourself from most other folks. Be a little nicer. Slow down to speed up.

You’d Better Be Working On Your Social Sales Skills

I’m blessed to speak to and train sales forces all over the USA and internationally on a weekly basis on how best to leverage Social Media for lead generation, client acquisition, top of mind awareness and a number of other sales-related functions.

Even after doing this for many years, I am reminded on a daily basis that regardless of an individual’s or an organization’s understanding of Social Media, they better have some very good sales skills. I can’t tell you how many entrepreneurs and small business owners (and large organizations, too) have an incredible product or service but they aren’t getting the traction they should in the marketplace.

Without blaming the economy or any other number of things, which are all really excuses, the bottom line is that they and/or their people better be sharpening their sales skills just as much as they’re sharpening their Social Media skills.

Here’s a few reasons why:

1) People’s buying habits aren’t the same as they were ten or twenty years ago. They’re doing almost all their research online before the salesperson even knows they’re interested in their product or service. By the time you enter the conversation, they’re just a few steps away from the purchase in many situations. You have  a very limited window of opportunity and you better be good at opening the relationship (not “closing the sale”).

2) There are so many options for the buyer. There’s this new thing called the internet. I hear it’s gonna be big. Your subject matter expertise an/or cool widget isn’t a differentiator anymore. Now it’s about adding massive value and leaving digital footprints of happy clients and customers behind you for prospective clients and customers to see. The Social Media Guru’s (and be aware that anyone who calls themselves a “guru” usually does so because they can’t spell “charlatan”) call this Social Proof. I call it reputation. It’s been around since the earth was cooling, only now everyone can see if you’re all hat and no cattle or the real deal.

3) Relationships are everything. Yeah, yeah, I know….everyone’s talking about the value of relationships. But talk is cheap. Show me how you’re building, enhancing and maintaining your relationships with your clients and prospective clients. As we become even more interconnected, relationship selling will become the norm because people don’t want to feel like a number or a prospect. We want to feel special and we’re far more likely to make a purchase because someone we know, like or trust has either bought from us in the past or has had some kind of a favorable experience with us.

I truly believe that there’s never been a better time to be a professional salesperson. But it’s gonna get harder and harder to be an amateur salesperson. The wheat and the chaff are being separated. Think of the 80/20 rule and then realize that it’s really more of a 95/5 rule. It’s high cotton in every direction when you marry great sales skills with great Social Media skills. Now go add massive value. There’s people out there who need your help.

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The Facebook Witness Relocation Program

Online friendships are a lot like offline friendships. There are those who are friends of yours for life regardless of geography. And there are those who are friends of yours for a season for any number of reasons such as being coworkers, friends of friends, etc.

I always find it interesting that some folks on Facebook show up continuously in comments, Likes, postings on your Wall for a period of time and then join the Witness Relocation Program. And then at some point down the road they show up hot and heavy again. And then they disappear for months. Or years. And then they show up again.

There’s nothing wrong with that. Just invest your time and attention in those who hang around.

Learning To Say No

In a more and more interconnected world, there are huge advantages to being able to pursue many avenues of income, friendship, relationships, etc. due to our interconnectivity.

At the same time, it’s very easy to get distracted by some shiny objects. Squirrel!

The more successful you become in your chosen profession, the more opportunities, offers and sales pitches are going to come your way.

Having the discipline to politely decline offers which are not closely aligned with your laser-focused goals is one of the most valuable skills you can develop.

Politely decline and stay focused on your goals.

Sharpen Your Saw

We get better at that which we study. And pros never stop studying.

I just returned from Tom Hopkins’ very last three-day “Sales Mastery Boot Camp” in beautiful Scottsdale, AZ. Tom has been conducting these Boot Camps for over three decades all around the world. When I heard he was going to be delivering his last one, I cleared out a few days in my calendar, went online and registered. I’m glad I did.

It’s always good to return to the basics of your craft. That’s what pros do. They continue to learn more and over time they continuously return to the basics. One of my favorite quotes for many years has been, “The most important thing is to remember that the most important thing is the most important thing.” This may sound like double-talk, but it’s not.

It’s very easy to get distracted with the flavor of the month or some shiny object and lose track of what’s most important in your profession. It happens to all of us. The trick is to keep your eye on the ball.

What do you do to keep yourself focused on the most important thing in your professional life? Is it attending a quarterly seminar by a leading authority in your field? Is it studying some publication in your industry? Is it taking a very successful person in your profession to lunch once a month and being mentored?

Most people never do these things. They’ll rationalize (rational lies) that they’re too busy. Not you. You’re smarter than that. Sharpen your saw.

Back In School

My daughter, Anja, started high school and my son, Tristan, started sixth grade this morning. It’s back to school time! When I was in school, when the earth was cooling, we didn’t have cell phones. We didn’t have iPads. We didn’t have jeans that cost extra if you bought them with holes already in them.

An interesting article came out today in the national news talking about how kids today never knew a world where Kurt Cobain was alive or where they had to take their film to the drug store to get developed. If you’re too young to get this last reference, you’re a punk.

But no matter how much the world and technology changes, it serves us well to remember that human nature never changes. People will always want to be appreciated and respected. We’ll always feel better when we receive a sincere compliment.

So while you’re keeping up with all the cool, gee-whiz, interwebs, electronics dohickeys, remember that all these tools are designed to increase human interaction, not decrease it. Take yourself back to school. Reread Dale Carnegie’s book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People”. And look at the world and the people around you through the eyes of a fascinated kid. The eleven or thirteen year-old boy or girl is still in there, you know.

Corporations Can’t Outrun Their Character

I love this post by Seth Godin: http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2012/08/corporations-are-not-people.html

I tell my audiences all the time that we can’t outrun our character. Neither can corporations.

Chris Brogan talks about humanizing business. I completely agree.

We are in an age now where what goes around, comes around. Literally at the speed of light. On fiber optic cables made of light called the internet.

Do the right thing. Because it’s the right thing to do. And all the wonderful things that will happen and come back to you in return will be the icing on the cake.

 

Make ‘Em Smile

In our busyness we sometimes forget what we need to do in terms of our clients and prospective clients. Yes, we need to under-promise and over-deliver. Yes, we need to keep an eye on emerging trends and threats. Yes, we need to do all that Harvard Business Review, high fallutin, MBA type stuff.

But here’s your real job: make ’em smile. And keep ’em smilin’.

Be real. Be a person like them. Have a heart. Never pass up opportunities to personalize things to make your clients feel more special.

I’m dealing with some technology and product fulfillment issues right now that are bugging the crap out of me. Majorly bugging me. Serious buggage. And it’s having an effect on my clients.

This is a good example of it’s not what happens, but how we handle it. I’m thinking creatively and coming up with ways to make ’em smile as I work through these glitches.

Most folks are pretty nice and they’ll cut you some slack if there’s a balance in the emotional bank account. Make them happy and keep them happy. And sometimes it’s as easy as asking them what will make them happy while you resolve the issues.

Let Them Know You Care

One of the nicest things we can do for someone is to provide encouragement. It’s wonderful to post inspiring messages on various Social Media platforms. But selecting one or a handful of people and encouraging them on a frequent basis is a whole other matter.

This needn’t take a tremendous amount of time. Just a check-in from time to time to see what they’re working on in their personal and professional lives and letting them know that you’re thinking of them and wishing them the best in everything they’re doing.

People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. Pick a person or five and let them know you care.

“Please” Works Wonders In Social Media

No matter how sophisticated technology gets, human nature stays the same. Maybe it’s my Jersey roots, but I don’t like being told what to do. But I don’t mind a polite request.

When I receive messages from people by email, Social Media platforms or old school papyrus telling me to “like” their page or “follow” them or “connect” with them, it sounds like an order to me. And I don’t like orders.

At the risk of sounding quaint, what would happen if these folks started their command with “please”? It would turn an order into a polite request or offer. And I’m betting that their responses would be more favorable.

Always err on the side of being too courteous. Both online and offline. “But Kev, what does this have to do with Social Media and business? I’m trying to grow a business here!” Exactly. And people can feel that. They can feel that you’re trying to grow a business and not grow relationships. And it shows.

As my friend, Bob Burg, taught me many years ago: “All things being equal, people do business with and refer business to people they know, like and trust.” A little courtesy goes a long way in this regard.

Female Olympians Finally And Social Media Not So Common Sense

The London Olympics are the first Olympics in history in which every country which is attending has at least one female athlete participating. Yes, reread that. Jeez Louise, it’s 2012, not 12. You can file this fact in the “it’s about friggin’ time” file.

It only took a couple thousand years for some people to figure out that women are athletes too. Amazing.

Another amazing thing is that a lot of people think they have to become Social Media experts. That’s like thinking that because you own a car, you need to become a transmission specialist. Leave the transmission to the transmission specialists and just learn to be a better driver.

Leave the nuances of Social Media platforms (which are all gonna change tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow) to the Social Media specialists and focus on delivering better content. It’s not about the technology, it’s about the value. It’s not about the transmission, it’s about the driving ability. It’s not about the iPhone, Android, smoke signals or two cans with a string, it’s about the conversation.

Bad Tweets Will Bite Cha’

Recently, an athlete from Greece was not allowed to compete in the London Olympics because of a racist tweet she posted on Twitter. This is an example of what I mean when I say that we can’t out-run our character.

In a more and more interconnected world, it serves us well to strive to become better people. If only for selfish reasons such as being able to pursue your life’s goal of competing in the Olympics.

As Dale Carnegie taught many years ago, “Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.” Those types of actions have always caught up with us. They just now catch up with us at the speed of light on fiber optic cables called the internet.

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Put In The Good

As you go through your day you’ll hear people talking about all the bad things happening in the world. Shootings, wars, and so on. Yes, these things exist and always will.

People sure love their iPads, iPhones, Androids, Bluetooths, and every other electronic leash that’s been invented. And yet they forget that these tools will connect them to whatever they want. Apparently they want a lot of negativity.

These amazing tools will also connect you to unlimited sources of inspiration and goodness. We choose what we put into your heads. Just look around and you’ll see all the choices people are making. It’s right in front of you when you look at folks and when you hear what comes out of their mouths. And what doesn’t come out of their mouths.

Choose to put positivity in on a daily basis. Putting it in multiple times each day is even better. And soon you’ll feel the same way about putting negativity in your head the way you feel about putting battery acid in your mouth. Why would you ever put that in?