The world feels like it’s getting smaller, but it’s the same size it has always been. It may be getting a littler bit warmer since Al Gore invented the internet, but it’s not getting any smaller.

It feels like it’s getting smaller because we’re seeing more and more every day how interconnected we really are. And as I always tell my audiences, “You can’t outrun your character.” However you are, you are online, offline, in the boardroom and in the 7-11.

Over the last few weeks I’ve had a few former bosses reach out to me and let me know that they’re looking to change careers or that they’ve been let go at their jobs. I let them know that if I can ever direct any opportunities their way, I’ll do so.

Don’t burn bridges. The people who worked for you at one point may be the ones you’re reaching out to when you need a hand up. And vice versa.

Regardless of your role or position in a company or in any organization build relationships. Invest in building relationships. In a crazy, fast-paced and often chaotic world, your relationships will see you through whatever comes your way.

High tech is nice, but high touch is everything. It’s great connecting with people on LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, YouTube and many other Social Media platforms.

But when you can, get together face to face. Start a relationship online and then take it offline.

We’re all busier than ever. With all the traveling I do, it’s easy to not see friends face to face for long periods of time. I don’t like that so I decided to start a new tradition in 2012.

Once a month Karin and I host a dinner party at our home for friends and people we’d like to get to know better. Many of the people we’d like to know better we’ve come to know online through Social Media platforms.

I kinda like the 1950′s kinda feel of a dinner party. We have two or three couples and some singles and they bring their kids. I cook a nice meal and we all have some wine, beer, soda or whatever. We play Trivia Pursuit, ping-pong, Wii, Pictionary or something else fun.

Spending time face to face is a lot different than just reading someone’s Facebook updates, and a great way to maintain relationships. What are you doing in 2012 to connect more deeply with the people you enjoy spending time with?

As you’re winding down 2011, I’m sure you’re taking a few minutes to review the year and take stock of how it all panned out. Did you hit your goals? Did you have goals? How did your job or business fare in 2011? Despite the economic tsunami, did you stay afloat or perhaps even thrive?

Think about your professional and personal relationships. How are you doing with the people you work with? Look back at December of 2010 and think of how your professional relationships were then and ask yourself if there’s been any change between then and now? Is it for the better or worse? There is no status quo in relationships.

How about your personal relationships? How’s it going with your spouse, kids, relatives, and friends? Take a minute and ask yourself if these relationships are getting stronger or are they getting weaker? Remember that kids often spell love as “time.” And spouses are kids with long, hairy legs.

Regardless of how 2011 worked out for you, give thanks. We have a lot to be thankful for. Our health, families, country, and many other things should be on our thankful list. I’ve always thought that it’s nice that Thanksgiving and Christmas come so close together. And if you don’t celebrate Christmas, insert your holiday of choice. This season is the perfect time to give thanks, spread the love, and to celebrate.

In the holiday season, we’re used to giving gifts. So let’s take that spirit to our interactions on Social Media platforms. During the month of December, set a goal to invest ten minutes every morning giving gifts. Gifts that cost you nothing. Gifts that touch people and make them feel better. Gifts of appreciation.

Get your morning cup of coffee and plop down in front of your computer and pull up Facebook. Go to your home page and see who is having a birthday today. Post a birthday message on their Wall. If you’d like to post something cool for them, feel free to go to my Wall and copy and paste the birthday greeting that I send people every day. I’m at www.facebook.com/kevinjknebl and if we’re not already friends, feel free to “friend me.” See what’s going on in your Facebook friends’ lives and click the “Like” button or make brief comments on their posts letting them know that you appreciate them. Or just wish them happy holidays. Just be sincere.

Then go on over to LinkedIn and look at the Status Updates of your connections. You can refine the updates to show recent Recommendations, Postings, Pictures, etc. I like seeing who has recently changed their profile picture and sending them a message like “Hey Bob, nice new mug shot. Looking good, bro. Happy holidays, Kev”.  Touch people. People like to know that someone is thinking of them. Spread the holiday love.

Gifts don’t have to come in little blue Tiffany boxes. Gifts don’t have to come with big bows on them like in the Lexus commercials. Often the greatest gifts are the ones that touch our heart. There’s usually a correlation between sincere, inexpensive, unexpected gifts and the recipient’s warmest thoughts for the giver. Take a little time this season to let people know that you’re thinking of them. Don’t try to position them for business in 2012. Don’t you dare mention your business. Just let them know that you care. End 2011 on a warm note with your professional and personal relationships, and you will start 2012 on the right foot. Happy holidays.

In this more and more hyper-competitive, over-caffeinated, 24/7/365, Blackberry/Crackberry, Mach 5 with your receding hairline on fire world, one of the most valuable commodities on earth is attention. Yes, attention. You’re reading this right now. I am blessed to have your attention.

Knowing this, always be asking yourself how you can over-deliver in the value department with everyone you come into contact with. Everyone. Not just the folks who you think may end up being your clients. Not just the people who you think may end up referring business to you. Everyone.

The world seems to be getting smaller, but it’s not. It’s just that we’re now able to see all the hidden connections we already had, and we’re able to add more value to more people in more ways that we couldn’t have imagined ten years ago.

Get people’s attention by becoming sincerely interested in them and their business and personal lives. The technical term for this is “being friendly.” One of the smartest decisions you can make is deciding to study friendliness with the same vigor that you studied whatever you’ve chosen as a career. Because friendliness is critical to your career.

People are in a hurry. Get their attention by over-delivering. Even if it’s only over-delivering in the smile department. You’re a mosquito in a nudist colony of opportunity. And don’t forget, you only have to apply this to every human you come in contact with for the rest of your life. Easy peasy. It’s actually never been easier to get people’s attention. The simplest and most profitable math you’ll ever do is adding value.

I love my barber. I love getting my hair cut because I get to sit and talk with Morris. He’s been cutting my hair for five years and although I moved a few months ago and he’s now 30 miles away, I still make the trip to see him.

He and I were talking this morning about gaining and keeping our best clients. He and I are in two very different lines of work, but not really.

We were talking about how little it takes to be above average. You do realize that just about everyone is average, don’t you? (that’s sarcastic, Jersey humor – which is redundant).

Yes, you need to be technically competent in your chosen profession. But that’s just admission to the game. If you don’t have that, you won’t be in the game for long. Buh-bye, thanks for playing.

By taking a sincere interest in your clients and would-be clients, you completely differentiate yourself from your competition.

Before you think that sounds too simple to be true, think back to your most recent amazing customer experience. Did it take you more than a few seconds to remember that? If so, you just proved my point.

Care more for people. I didn’t say clients, customers, or potential clients or customers. I said people. Treat people like people. Not customers.

Take a sincere interest in people by asking them questions about themselves. This is not difficult. It’s so simple, it’s amazing more people don’t do it.

Listening is an act of compassion. Ask sincere, thoughtful questions and then listen. Don’t interrupt, just listen. Don’t try to solve all their problems, just listen. Don’t see an opportunity to introduce your product or service. Don’t be a hammer in search of a nail. Be a caring human being willing to give the most valuable commodity in the world. Attention.

Listening is a sign of caring. And people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. It takes so little to be above average.

When I was a kid and my Mom took me to the butcher shop when we lived in Germany, I remember that the butcher would slice off a few pieces of deli meat and give them to me and my brothers. He would give samples. This is a smart business practice.

As I get to know my clients around the world in all different industries, I notice that some of them give samples and some of them don’t. And a “sample” could be a meeting, a consultation, a product or anything of value to the potential client or customer.

There was a time not too long ago, when people and businesses were very concerned about intellectual property. Intellectual property rights should be observed, but as we become more interconnected, I believe there’s good reason to loosen up a little bit.

Being tight-fisted regarding your content and services will not serve you or your business well in the long run. You’re actually telling your potential client more about yourself, the way you conduct business, and the type of relationship you’re potentially going to develop with them, than you probably realize you are.

By giving away samples, you are letting the potential client know a lot about you and your business. You’re exhibiting your generosity and starting to develop a “Know, Like, Trust” relationship.

Will some people run with your free, unpaid consulting from time to time? Yup. That’s just the cost of doing business. But people are pretty smart. We all like doing business with people who are generous and a delight to communicate with.

Give a little. Don’t give away the farm, but give value from the get-go with everyone.

What goes around comes around. As you’re going around, give a little more. And you might be pleasantly surprised as to how much more comes around.

Life moves pretty fast and if we really understood the impact that our words and actions have on other people and ultimately on ourselves, we’d probably be a little more selective with the things we say and do.

Every interaction with another person is either a deposit or a withdrawal from that particular relationship. Be smart and make deposits.

Negative comments and attitudes are withdrawals. There’s an old saying that goes, “You can’t afford the luxury of a negative thought.” I agree with that.

That doesn’t mean that you have to become a superman of positivity and beat yourself up if you have negative thoughts. Everyone has negative thoughts. The question is: do you dwell on it, let it fester and then spread it like a virus, or do you choose to change your thoughts and focus on positive things?

Take this line of thinking to Social Media. Everything you post is also either putting deposits in or taking withdrawals from the relationships you have with folks on LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, etc.

We all have crap in our lives. And most people have enough crap of their own without needing us throwing ours on them. Post positive, not negative. Spread the love, not the hate.

Long term, nothing good comes from spewing negative. And it’s definitely not a luxury.

Remember that when people think of you, they immediately have a picture and feeling of you based on every interaction they’ve ever had with you.  Give them something good to think about.

On the right-hand side of your LinkedIn homepage is a very interesting button called “Who’s Viewed Your Profile”. Depending on how a person’s LinkedIn settings are configured you can see with some limited visibility who’s been looking at your LinkedIn profile. Huge door of opportunity alert.

Many people spend a lot of mental power trying to think up clever back door ways of doing things and getting people’s attention when they could just walk up to the nine-hundred-pound elephant in the middle of the room and hug it.

I check this LinkedIn feature everyday and send a message to the people who’ve viewed my profile. Here’s my standard message:

“Hi Bob, 

I noticed that you viewed my LinkedIn Profile. 

I’m all about paying-it-forward and adding massive value and I’d like you to make me prove it. 

May I help or serve you in some way? 

To your massive success, 
Kev”

I couldn’t begin to tell you the number of great relationships this has started, speaking and training opportunities booked, and other serendipities that have resulted as a result of me just extending my hand in friendship to people who obviously have some interest in me for some reason.

Make sure you’re making the most of every human interaction. Huge doors of opportunity swing on little, tiny hinges. Hear that creaking? That’s another hinge. And by the way….another word for hinges is relationships.

People often ask me, “Kev, how should I be on Social Media?” I get a kick out of that question, because it’s similar to asking me, “Kev, how should I be on the telephone?”

Let’s change the word “on” to “through.” You’re not “on” the telephone anymore than you’re “on” Social Media. You communicating through the telephone and through Social Media.

So my answer to their question is usually, “Be however you would be face to face.” You should be yourself because everyone else is already taken.

The words “authentic” and “transparent” have almost become clichés, but they make sense. People are going to figure out who you are anyway, so you may as well be authentic and transparent.

But even those words are a little too “marketing speak” for me. I like a simpler word. Like “real”.

Be real. Because people will figure out whether you’re real or not very quickly. And don’t worry so much about “getting” real.

Just be real. Really.

Whether online or offline, manners make a difference.  I like to call internet etiquette, “netiquette”.

A habit I learned a long time ago that has served me very well through the years is starting phone conversations with, “Hi John, it’s Kev. Do you have a quick minute or is this a bad time?”

There are very few people who start conversations like this. It’s a huge show of respect to the person whom you’re calling.

Make sure you’re doing the same thing online. Because I often have Facebook running in the background on my computer, people pop up in the chat box all the time and often just launch into conversations.

And sometimes they’re people I don’t know well at all that start conversations with sales pitches. Yikes.

Remember that most people are quite busy. Approach them politely and be respectful of their time. I guarantee you the outcome of your conversation will turn out better when you do.